Jonah was a prophet...

I started this as a facebook post, and as it got longer and longer--I realized it really wasn't a facebook post.  So here I am journaling it.  I have been saying I need to be better about keeping my journal again.  Maybe 2016 I will...maybe.  I have other goals that mean more to me than that.  So we will see.
Kaje came on the paper route with me this morning.  Which had me singing follow the prophet instead of my normal routine.  One verse says "Jonah was a prophet, tried to run away.  But he later learned to listen and obey." And that's the lesson I usually get for the story.  I've also focused on the lesson of forgiveness.  We are all sinners and if I want God to extend mercy to me--why wouldn't he extend that same mercy to others?  Today I really heard and pondered the second half of that verse: "When we really try, the Lord won't let us fail; That's what Jonah learned deep down inside the whale."  And I am asking myself really?  As I am dealing with a house I didn't want to buy and tenants who hate me.  But I am trying to listen and obey.  I remember the last time I asked really? When we were singing the last vs to I believe in Christ.  "I believe in Christ so come what may."  I thought those very bold words at the time.  And I tried the Lord, and I have found that all things do work for the good of those who put their trust in the Lord.  I find I learn better from music then I do from talks anyway.  But if that was true--I believe this will be too.  I do believe that our hymns and primary music are inspired.  And what a promise!
On another note--maybe because I did do the papers and my children cuddled with me instead of letting me go to bed early, so I'm a bit rambly this morning--I love being in primary.  I've talked with some about the struggles and drama that comes with organizing the Primary. I joke that someone else could have it.  And then not so jokingly about how I've usually avoided drama especially within my ward--And now I'm smack dab in the middle of having to deal with it.  This is my least favorite part.  This has been my hardest lesson.  But other than the drama--I love being in primary.  I love the music.  I love the kids.  I love the ladies I get to work with--the men aren't so bad either.  I love teaching (once I've actually planned it).  I am learning to enjoy the organization of it all too.  I have come to learn in a powerful way that this is the Lord's work.  And He makes it work out because it matters to Him.  I only have a small part in that--and it is a pleasure.  And I am grateful for these grown up moments when my testimony is strengthened and expanded in ways I would have never imagined just because I'm singing primary songs with my son (and trying to memorize all the verses to Follow the Prophet.)  Go figure.
I read recently on facebook "I don't want to be the kind of Christian who appears perfect.  I am flawed, that's why I need Christ."  And oh baby, I am flawed.  And I'm being stretched.  And I'm learning and growing and isn't that what this life is all about?  I really do try though.  I am not a half hearted person.  Never have been.  And I do try to give it my all.  And atleast I didn't have to be swallowed by a whale to learn it myself.